AMY MEISSNER
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The shortlist.

3/28/2015

17 Comments

 
Sometimes you're trucking along with your textile art, the kids aren't coughing up massive amounts of phlegm so they're actually at school and the sun's coming back and the cat is only mildly annoying in your studio, when you get an email that floors you. Like the one that comes from your art director in Canada, who you haven't spoken with in a while because you've been doing a few other things, and the letter says that a book you illustrated has made the Shortlist for maybe a Lovely Prize. It's a prize that might involve a gold sticker (oh, don't be silly -- not THE gold sticker).

And your first response is: Seriously?

Picture

You measure time by your children. The shapes of their faces. The size of their feet. The clothes you know they were wearing in 2013 when you were working on this project, the shirts and pants and little monster-print underwear they've outgrown. You have a vague moment in the kitchen just now where you wish you could look at their height measurements and dates on the wall, just to check this perception of time, but that would've required making those milestone marks on the door trim in the first place and this isn't something you ever did. 

Why didn't you?

Illustration from the book Saving Sammy, Orca Book Publishers. www.amymeissner.com/blog/the-shortlist
Cover sketch #1
Illustration from the book Saving Sammy, Orca Book Publishers. www.amymeissner.com/blog/the-shortlist
Cover sketch #2

When the book came out, one reviewer commented that the artwork was "old fashioned," and you wanted to punch this person's lights out. But you'd never do this. Because you are, in fact, old fashioned. You've come to accept this much since then:  you want to create work that demands the viewer acknowledges the presence of the hand, not the hard edge of the machine. And this feels like a quality. Something good that you'll never lose. But what seemed like a criticism hurt at the time, even though you told yourself you have a thick skin.

Sheesh, you're so bad at lying.

And maybe you just needed some space, because now that comment does't seem like a criticism at all. It just seems truthful.

Illustration from the book Saving Sammy, Orca Book Publishers. www.amymeissner.com/blog/the-shortlist
Cover sketch #3
Illustration from the book Saving Sammy, Orca Book Publishers. www.amymeissner.com/blog/the-shortlist
Cover sketch #4

When you inform your husband about the Shortlist and the Maybe Lovely Prize he is pressing hamburger hurriedly into patties because your great plan to have poached eggs for dinner, again, isn't appealing. He molds and shapes and just says, "Huh." 

You think he should be more excited than "Huh," you think maybe there should be a party, or a half a beer and then you have an internal hissy moment where you consider punching his lights out. But you'd never do this because you're old fashioned. And anyway, he isn't saying "Huh," because he doesn't care. He's saying "Huh," because he's just gotten off an airplane and he's making hamburgers because he doesn't want poached eggs and he probably has a headache and because he's stuck in his brain trying to remember that wife-working-as-an-illustrator time and that person who you were when you made this book, when really, he's still getting used to wife-as-a-textile-artist-and-always-poached-eggs-for-dinner time. And that first version of you seems like it happened a long time ago. 

Because it sort of did.

Illustration from the book Saving Sammy, Orca Book Publishers. www.amymeissner.com/blog/the-shortlist
Illustration from the book Saving Sammy, Orca Book Publishers. www.amymeissner.com/blog/the-shortlist

And later, when the kids are sloshing in the tub upstairs while your husband reads to them and you're still cleaning in the kitchen (good Lord, do you ever leave this kitchen?) you're left groping for the invisible marks on your heart. The ones that measure time and happiness and growth. 

Are you sure you're ok not illustrating right now? Yes.
Were you happy before the Maybe Lovely Prize Shortlist? Yes. And now? Yes.
Do images of baby beavers still make you crack up? Yes.
Do you still want a half a beer? Yes.
Are you going to stop making the art you're making now any time soon? No.
And we're all in agreement that you're old fashioned? Yes.

Is the cat making you only mildly insane? 

          Oh, for Pete's sake. 

Amy Meissner, from the post The Shortlist. www.amymeissner.com/blog/the-shortlist

Many thanks to Orca Book Publishers in Victoria, BC for asking me to illustrate Eric Walters' book Saving Sammy and to the Nature Generation for considering this sweet little story for the Green Earth Award. What a total honor on all fronts.

Other posts about children's book illustration on this blog are: A little side job and Rudder.

(But most posts are about textile art + history + family. And how none of it exists without the others).

17 Comments
Olga link
3/28/2015 02:00:13 am

Congratulations - to them for recognising your quality! Great to be on such a shortlist.
As a long retired children's book publisher, I know that it's the timeless quality of illustration which is what counts. That's also what you engage with in your current work.

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Amy Meissner link
3/28/2015 03:16:54 am

Dear Olga,
Kindred spirit! Thank you for commenting about timelessness. In the world of digital EVERYTHING, it's hard to remain true to what feels right to you, especially when the the work you do is so much more time consuming than others in your field. I am very conscious of what I want my children exposed to and ultimately want them to recognize beauty. This means making sure they aren't becoming desensitized by getting blasted by constant media and over-the-top imagery. Right now, in our speed-filled world, pulling back and slowing down can feel extremist. I have to constantly remind myself what the real detriment to their childhood is and tow the line. (I'll pay for their therapy later).
Thank you so much for reading and responding--
XO Amy

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Dana link
3/28/2015 02:01:28 am

It must feel great to be recognized for your work, even if that work has swept on downstream from what concerns you now. As you said at the end, everything in your life informs and shapes everything else. Congratulations, and thanks for "showing your work" in what is clearly a wonderfully illustrated book. Its so interesting to see the development of an idea.

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Amy Meissner link
3/28/2015 03:22:19 am

Dear Dana,
Thank you for your kind words and I'm glad you enjoyed seeing the process sketches. I think it's so important for people to understand how much work goes into something before achieving the final product. I, too, really love seeing others' process and gaining a deeper understanding and reverence for all kinds of creative work.
XO Amy

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Helen link
3/28/2015 04:45:40 am

Thank you, Amy...

For sharing your art in all its forms, and for reminding us all of the special value in the cherished and hand-crafted, carefully constructed stitch by stitch and line by line, in the middle of this rushing and pushing and instant-gratification-demanding world.
And for sharing it in such compelling, well-crafted (line by line) prose.

Congratulations on your shortlisting, and sending you very best wishes from many miles away.

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Amy Meissner link
3/28/2015 05:29:33 am

Helen,
Thank you for contacting me! I'm always excited to hear from friends in far-away lands (really, if we just go up and over the top of the world, we're probably only 6-8 hours apart...). I appreciate your time and kind words.
XO
Amy

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judy martin link
3/28/2015 12:32:32 pm

Excellent! A beautiful, personal, urgent, meaningful, truthful, post. Congratulations on the nomination for your work and best of luck in all you put your talented hands to. We are all better for your mind and heart's work, Amy. x

Reply
Amy Meissner link
3/29/2015 03:56:58 am

Judy,
As always, I can't believe you read my little blog. Thank you.
XOXOX
Amy

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carolyn halliday link
3/29/2015 07:41:52 am

You made me smile so I wanted to let you know that. Congratulations and ongoing success, especially with your textile art.

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Amy Meissner link
3/30/2015 02:01:40 pm

Carolyn,
If bloggers were contacted each time they made someone smile, there would be more well written blogs because writers would be reminded that there is actually an audience to write for other than themselves. That said, I write the blog I want to read. Hopefully it's the blog you want to keep reading, too.
Thank you.
XO Amy

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catherine Lawes link
3/29/2015 04:47:06 pm

Once again Amy another encouraging and timely piece. I agree with others that the old fashioned is beautiful. Many congratulations. I love the illustration and seeing the process of creation. I have collected several books with so called old fashioned covers for my twin grandsons - 2 1/4 yrs old. As an architect by training and one who never used Autocad I really appreciate hand drawn work. One of my favourite children's books is 'The Fabrics of Fairy Tale - Stories Spun from far and wide' , published by barefoot Books, UK - all the illustrations are hand stitched pictures.

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Amy Meissner link
3/30/2015 02:05:20 pm

Catherine,
As the wife of an architect who learned to draft by hand AND use Autocad (and still finds great joy in a roll of trace and a Sharpie) ... I feel blessed to be of the generation who understands that technology is a tool to find the answer, and isn't simply THE answer. I will look for this amazing book you've described! Lovely and thank you!
XO
Amy

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Kaylene Johnson-Sullivan link
3/30/2015 07:42:24 am

Amy,
Your words are also your art and the timing of this post could not have been better. I am working on making space in my life to create -- not just meet a deadline. Thanks for being you, for creating honestly and from the heart, and the great idea of poached eggs for dinner!

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Amy Meissner link
3/30/2015 02:11:21 pm

Hi Kaylene,
Poached eggs, shredded cabbage tossed with oil and vinegar and dill, and a healthy amount of Kim Chi. Now I ask, why am I the only one in my family who could eat this 6 nights a week?
Make space. Make eggs. Make some Kim Chi too, because I'm burning through jars of it and fermenting is the hot new thing and then we'll be really hip.
Thanks for being you, too.
XO Amy

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Sara Cassidy link
4/1/2015 04:11:02 am

Amy, you are wonderful. Congratulations on this shortlist!! Your textile work is stunning. Do you have any pieces for sale? Love your blog, too.
Sara

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Amy Meissner link
4/1/2015 05:24:08 am

Hello Lovely and Talented Canadian Writer Sara Cassidy!
What a thrill to hear from you here, right here, on my little blog! I hope you are well. Thank you for the very nice complements. I'm madly creating work for a solo show in June and am considering setting up a "store" page mid-summer, but that's a big job that I'm very happy to put off. In the meantime, the larger pieces on the portfolio page are available (unless in private or permanent collections, which is indicated) and I have a slew of smaller work either finished or in process that play off those themes. If there is an image you are smitten by in a post somewhere, let me know. I'm also available for commissioned projects.
Take care,
XO
Amy

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Deborah C. Stearns link
4/4/2015 10:55:36 am

Congratulations! The illustrations are lovely. I think the word they wanted was "classic" or "timeless." ;-)

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    Amy Meissner, textile artist. Photo credit Brian Adams, 2013. www.amymeissner.com

    Amy Meissner

    Artist in Anchorage, Alaska, sometimes blogging about the collision of history, family & art, with the understanding that none exists without the other.

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